7th January 2021

These posts were originally posted on the YNAB forums and MoneySavingForums (a UK money management site), I am moving my journals across to WordPress to have them in chronological order, and because the YNAB forums are closing as of March 2022. I’m not sure how much of other people’s words I’m allowed to copy across from one site to another, so in some sections I may summarise conversations.

I have a regret. There was an internal vacancy within Santander for THE JOB I want… but in another city. And I’m not in the mood to move city. So I didnt apply, and it closed, and the more I think about it the more I regret. 

Now at no point was it ever guaranteed. There was no button that said “this job is 100% yours if you just CLICK HERE!” and tbh I technically fell mildly short of the requirements as they wanted you to have completed 2 FA Diploma modules and I’ve only completed 1 module. (6 modules is a complete diploma)

And I don’t want to move city. But for this job? I have no kids, no partner… I know I’m capable of moving city, it just sucks for a month or two.

So. Next time the opportunity comes up, I guess. :/  Now I know.


In a more positive note, I just had a funny moment that shows how far my habits have come. At Christmas I got £50 in cash, but I only deposited £40 into my account/budget, I kept £10 in my pocket for walking around money. For chippies, pretty much. 

I don’t put physical cash into my budget because I use it so rarely, it’s just not worth tracking.

And today I spent a little of that money on a snack, and as I was wandering down the street, munch munch, I had a small moment of panic and grabbed my pocket as I thought – I forgot to enter my transaction! 

I didnt need to enter that transaction but it made me laugh a little that was my instinct.


In response to a commenter saying that their policy is to apply to anything they’re eligible for

 I’m doing something broadly similar right now, although I’m staying within the UK. Mostly at this point when I apply I’m just confirming I know roughly where it is in the UK, that I’m thinking of the right place. I’ll do more in depth research regarding cost of living, etc, if any application invites me back for a deeper discussion. For the same logic above: I don’t have to take it. An application isn’t a sworn contract to definitely take the job if offered.

There’s actually one application that’s really interesting, in that it’s the town I had to semi-flee from to escape my ex. The salary is VERY good, £28K (I’m currently on £18K), and I do love the idea of swanning back into town like “look at me, I lost 10kg, came out as trans, and got a much much better job” and he’s still stacking shelves on minimum wage… I honestly don’t know if I’d actually take the job and go back if offered, but tbh it literally has in capital letters must be Diploma qualified, whereas I’m still studying towards the diploma, so chances are pretty low for me. I just like imagining it and it was a one click apply. 

Another commenter gave me the advice to think “What Would A Mediocre White Man Do?” A mediocre white man would apply to literally every job he was even remotely qualified for.

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